Yesterday I found a carpenter who was willing to come out first thing this morning. Rowan and I spent an hour cleaning out the closet in preparation, and we found that the mold situation was worse than originally thought. I guess that's often the case with mold. It.... grows. Here is a picture of the closet after we got everything out of it. I couldn't even get all the mold into one shot... it continues up onto the ceiling and off to the right. This is, keep in mind, a very large walk-in closet, about six by twelve feet or so. I know, it's hideous. I am deeply, deeply ashamed.
The carpenter, when he arrived, said "you need to get this out of here now!"
I said, "you think?"
Luckily, he was able to begin right away. He said we couldn't know what the true situation was until we pulled out the rotten drywall and took a look at the wood underneath. Then, hopefully, we would be able to see where the water was coming from and how extensive the damage was. The good news (there is some good news!) is that the wood underneath is not rotted. It is still intact. That means this hasn't been going on that long.
But that's also the bad news: the water is coming in because the gutters are non-functional and water is backing up behind them and just sitting there. The gutters are non-functional because Homero "fixed" them.
Okay, it's another long story, and I just don't have the energy right now. It's not really Homero's fault, of course, it's the fault of the stupid cheap ass previous owners who did everything the weaselly cop-out way. None of this is going to make sense without blueprints or a far more in-depth explanation than I am up to, but basically what happened is that Homero tried to correct a problem created by the previous owners and accidentally made it worse instead.
The long and the short of it is we need new gutters. Right now, what we have is actually worse than no gutters at all. So now I am faced with a dilemma. I have the motive, means, and opportunity to go ahead and get it all done before Homero gets home. But should I?
If I wait, I will have to try to convince him of all this all over again. He will insist on doing it all himself. But he DOESN'T KNOW HOW to do it right. Nor is he willing to spend the money to buy the right materials or hire help. I now have, alas, ample evidence that my dear, beloved husband is a really really crappy carpenter (He's a fantastic mechanic, by the way. One of the best. Really. He's a 100% ASE certified master mechanic. I guess it just doesn't translate). He used the wrong materials, he ran things the wrong way, he basically made everything worse in a way that could potentially result in lifelong lung disease for all of us.
If I go ahead and get it done in his absence, I am courting divorce. He really takes this sort of thing extremely personally. Doing it before he gets here is a vote of no-confidence. I realize that. But... really, do I have to get COPD in order to keep my husband happy? Is that one of the marriage vows?
9 comments:
One of the things about following an acquaintance's blog...I have a tendancy to say more than I probably would in person, 'cause I don't know you too well. I apologize in advance if I overstep my bounds.
It seems to me that NOT doing it would also be courting divorce. You seem to have reached a limit with this one, and want it done right and quickly. So either way, it's going to be a battle of hurt feelings/egos/etc. on one side or the other, or both.
But, in addition to marital woes (whichever way you go), your family's health is in danger. That should be the tie breaker. Get it done ASAP, I say.
Don't worry about boundaries, Melinda. If I cared, I wouldn't have posted this, would I? Thanks for the advice, and I think you are right. As my mom used to say, it's easier to get forgiveness than permission.
Yikes !! that sure is a job needing URGENT attention. Just tell Homero I said it, he can blame me. (lol)
I'd vote for just getting it done also. While Homero may insist that he would have done it himself, I'm sure part of him will be relieved that it's one less thing to do - and I get the sense that between your house and the farm there are no shortages of other things for him to do.
I'm with all the other ladies. Besides, he reads your blog, getting it done can't make it much worse.
DO IT DO IT DO IT!!!! DO IT QUICK BEFORE HE GETS HOME!!!
OH yeah, then blame the carpenter for scaring the crap out of you and the girls about what would happen if you didn't fix this QUICKLY so you HAD to take action, and you know he would NEVER want you to risk their health in order to save a few (or many) bucks, right?
Michele, thank you for weighing in, now I have an actual marriage counselor on my side! I promise not to invoke your name. But as to his not wanting to compromise our health to save money.... do you remember the asbestos story I told you on our first visit?????
BTW ladies, I have decided and it's going ahead. Work may not be finished before he gets home, but I will have signed contracts paid in full.
Do it now. I hope you did it. Sometimes you just have to do the right thing. Homero loves you. He will know in his heart that the right thing for the health of your family was to take care of it immediately.
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