"United we bargain, divided we beg."

Friday, April 17, 2009

Eggbeaters Are Too Complicated For Me

If anyone wants to know what kind of person I am, I really can't do better than to say I'm the kind of person who gets an electric eggbeater stuck in her hair. 


While making a fancy cheesecake for Rowan's school's fundraiser ball tomorrow night, I somehow leaned over the bowl too far and before I knew it, my handheld electric eggbeater had grabbed some of my hair and whirled up my head and was yanking my hair right out of my scalp. 

I'm not the kind of person of whom it is said "she really keeps her cool in a crisis," and so it didn't, at first, occur to me to pull the plug. Instead I staggered about the kitchen bellowing like a bull and clutching wildly at my head trying to find the off button. Luckily the cord isn't very long and I yanked it out of the wall in my thrashing dance of agony. 

Rowan came running, yelling "what's wrong, mom?" only to stop dead at the sight of me with a small appliance stuck to my head, not to mention about a half a pound of cream cheese. With her help, I was able to pop the beaters out of the machine body, which was an improvement, but I was in a not inconsiderable amount of pain. The motor had run long enough to roll the beaters right up against my scalp and  pull my hair extremely hard. Between the pain and the sheer ridiculousness, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. So I did both.

To make a long story short, I only lost a hank of hair about the thickness of my pinky finger; cream cheese washes out fairly easily; and no, I didn't take a picture. 

6 comments:

TheMartianChick said...

Oh, my! I tried not to laugh at the mental image of this, but I couldn't help myself! I'm assuming it wasn't a KitchenAid...You would have never gotten it out! I am glad that you weren't seriously hurt and that you felt free to share it with all of us.Now we know why those school lunch ladies wore hair nets!

Aimee said...

Thank God I never sprang for a Kitchen Aid stand mixer. I might be dead.

AnyEdge said...

Querelous Passerby: "So, what's your sister like?"

AnyEdge: "She's the sort of person who gets an electric eggbeater caught in her hair."

Querelous Passerby: "Ah. They say there's more and more of those these days."

AnyEdge: "Sadly, that's one of those urban rumors that seem to sprout like fungus after a warm spring rain. It isn't true. My sister is the only one."

Querelous Passerby: "They why would you describe her as one of a sort? Surely you might merely have said that 'My sister gets electric eggbeaters caught in her hair.'. Why lump her in to a nonexistant ensemble?"

AnyEdge: "You've done your adjective proud. Do us both a favor, and live up to your noun."

EXIT Querelous Passerby, in somthing of a HUFF.

AnyEdge: "What a jerk."

And.........scene.

Aimee said...

I really hope I'm not the ONLY one. In pursuit of that forlorn hope, I called my friend Sarah, who bakes a whole lot and has waist length hair, but no: it's never happened to her.

momtomany said...

I've been enjoying your posts, Aimee. It's fuel for my future farming fantasies :)
This post brings back a painful memory. I was making pancakes with my eldest daughter when she was almost 4 years old. As I was beating the batter with a hand mixer, she leaned across the counter for the butter and one little wisp of her beautiful long hair got too close to the mixer... boy, it happened so fast! After cleaning up the very goopy mess in her hair, she was left with only a little bruising, a couple of little what-looked-like-shaving-nicks, and, sadly, a bald patch about 2"x5" on the top of her head. I cried so much that day. I felt so bad about it. We can't foresee every possible accident, but I've been so very cautious with the hand mixer since then! There, Aimee.... you're not the only one.... and it could've been worse. (DD is 17 now and has beautiful long hair again).

Aimee said...

momtomany -
I'm so glad you've been having fun with my blog. You are the first proof that I am not the only person in the history of the world to have caught an eggbeater in my hair. Thanks for that! Glad to hear your dear daughter recovered nicely. So did I.
Aimee